The bright glow of a large computer screen met my eyes. Everything else around me was dark, veiled in shadows. “This must be the real-time zone.” I thought to myself. The real-time zone is an out-of-body state that closely borders that of the waking world. They both share many of the same features, but there are always slight variations.
There was no keyboard, or any other human input device, to be found, so I made an brief effort of typing to the screen psychically. Various GUI elements came and went, but I couldn’t make sense of them.
I stopped and felt for Catherine’s presence, as I often do in these states. Though I could not see her, I knew she wasn’t far away.
“Can you show yourself to me?” I put out that oft asked question into the void between us. More often than not, I’ll begin to feel pressure sensations from her, just like I do in the waking world. But this time, she did something quite unexpected.
A cascade of flowing, silky auburn hair blanketed my vision. The color was vivid and the innumerable strands swayed gracefully before my eyes.
A bit of Catherine’s humor shining through, no doubt. I ask to see her more clearly during dreams and OBEs on a regular basis… and I mean to REALLY see her; not just the human guises she puts on. I can tell the difference, and I think she knows this. We’re familiar enough with each other by now.
This was a vision that she allowed me to see on Christmas morning, her flowing mane, shrouding the face of an unending mystery. To this day, I’ve had but brief glimpses of her divine nature. I’m reminded of Moses, when he was called up to meet the Lord on Mt. Sinai, and he was only permitted to see God’s back:
[Moses] said, “Please show me your glory.” [God] said, “I will make all my goodness pass before you, and will proclaim Yahweh’s name before you. I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy.”
He said, “You cannot see my face, for man may not see me and live.”
Yahweh also said, “Behold, there is a place by me, and you shall stand on the rock. It will happen, while my glory passes by, that I will put you in a cleft of the rock, and will cover you with my hand until I have passed by; then I will take away my hand, and you will see my back; but my face shall not be seen.” -Exodus 33:18-23
Perhaps the same rules apply for succubi and other demonic spirits. I have heard about other magicians being introduced to the true forms of the demons that they were working with. Not so with every case, but they were often terrified by what they witnessed.
Either Catherine is lovingly sparing me a bit of trauma, or she’s content to keep me guessing. At any rate, I’m forever chasing that mystery.