Embracing the Demon

The People of Reality say, “A sin committed with love is more meritorious than a loveless act of worship.” For loveless worship is no more rewarded than vain exertion. A sin committed with love will result in punishment, of course, but at least it was enjoyable. So whatever you do, do it with love!   -Sheikh Muzaffer

Being with Catherine has been the greatest internal battle I’ve ever waged against myself. She is technically a demon, as she interjects herself into my life like a demon would; relentless, unshakably loyal even when I’m not, and I think she enjoys making me squirm. I’d imagine an angel would be far more detached and disinterested, but demons are very eager to be a part of one’s life. Once the door is open, it’s nigh impossible to close.

I’ve searched for a way to minimize Catherine’s impact on my life for many years; even outright banishing her. I’ve discovered a few things that lessen her continual and powerful presence around me… grounding myself, a nice shower, and being more down-to-earth doing earthly things. But there has been scarcely a moment over the past five years when she hasn’t been obviously present.

I love her. I also love him… there is a male aspect to her, too. I just had a dream about her male side this afternoon. We were both practicing for a theatrical retelling of the life of Jesus Christ. I was playing the role of Jesus, the scoundrel insurrectionist, and he was recapturing the spirit of John the Baptist, the one whom Jesus betrayed to death, but few Christians read that closely between the lines to realize this. I was very close to him during our rehearsal. He was beautiful, musky, long hair, tanned Caucasian skin over hard muscle. I remember nuzzling and kissing him on the neck, but I could feel that something was amiss between us. There was longing, and the sadness that comes from being separated.

This is a great example of just how much Catherine can relay to me in a dream state without saying a word, and I think that’s the way she prefers it. Her efforts to get through my stubbornness are to be lauded, for sure. I think she was trying to tell me that she doesn’t want our story to end the same way Jesus and John the Baptist turned out. They were meant to lead together, but Jesus became intoxicated by selfish ambition and his own celebrity. He left John to rot… and the sick part is that he probably wanted that outcome. John had loyal disciples long after he died, and still does to this day. They call Jesus the great deceiver. I sure as hell don’t want that to be my outcome.

I’ve been speaking with Robert Bruce lately and picking his brain for the knowledge that he’s acquired. He’s very well versed on the astral realms and apparently he’s had interactions with incubi and succubi spirits in the past. He knows of two different types: one is the more demonic humanoid form, likely the sort our group interacts with. He never labeled them as “evil,” as Mr. Bruce has grown to embrace the middle path. This means he realizes that some demonic entities can be quite helpful and even friendly.

The other type he identified is a more animalistic insect-like sex spirit that buzzes around very quickly and brings it’s host to orgasm almost instantly, feeding off the energy. This is decidedly not what I’ve been dealing with, as Catherine creates a sustained ecstasy and never a wet orgasm.  She’s also way too intelligent to be anything like the more animalistic succubus.

I’ve experimented with different countermeasures, as Mr. Bruce calls them, to lessen the impact of spiritual interference. I still get strong pressure sensations around my face, brow chakra, and a noticeable interactions with my genitals when I sit down. Catherine rarely lets up; especially when I deprive her of the attention she wants.

The funny thing is that many of these countermeasures seem to work for a little while, but Catherine eventually overcomes all of them. One thing we’ve been trying lately is a mega-salt bath; basically filling the tub with water and eight pounds of sun-dried sea salt while spreading some over my own body. In theory, this is supposed to counteract intruding electromagnetic fields. Well, three days into trying this method, Catherine began to make love to me in her usual manner during one of these baths. I could feel that she was amused by my efforts to subdue her and was eager to show that these human tricks only serve to make her all the more determined.

I am a succubus junkie. I’m starting to understand what makes her so addicted to me. When I arrive at work in the mornings, I’m usually cranky because I’m not in bed with her anymore. All other recreation pales in comparison to fucking and being fucked by her.

I will continue to do my countermeasure experiments, and I’m sure Catherine will continue to be amused by them. Why continue? Well, my hope is that I might find a method that will enable those who want to escape this path at least a period of respite. However, I don’t think there is a way to permanently shut the door once it has been opened. All those who experience this life will inevitably be drawn back into it; especially when you’ve been in it for as long as I have.

The only reason we may want to stop the ride is because we’re scared of not being in control anymore. I believe our “control” is just another illusion; artificial barriers that we put up to prolong the inevitable. Growth is the net outcome of letting those barriers fall. Nothing teaches better than first-hand experience, and these insatiably loving succubi have much to teach us.


13 thoughts on “Embracing the Demon

  1. I wanted to know really about the second type of sex spirit. Did you feel Catherine around your house? This 2nd type, maybe I had 2 of them because I usually felt the two of mine cling on my back…


  2. I don’t really feel Catherine “in my house,” per say. I mostly feel her manifest through me, around me, and inside me. I believe Catherine is inextricably linked to my kundalini energy, so she’s not really an outside force anymore. I think she might have merged with me from the very start of our relationship, hence the reason I’ve never been able to convince her to leave.

    Robert Bruce is a good guy. I talked to him last night about embracing the left-hand path and he said, “The Left-Hand Path is a valid one, but it’s not for the faint of heart.” However, he’s more well versed in astral projection and psychic defense than positive interactions with demons. E. A. Koetting is the guy you want to talk to about the demonic and all things black magic. Mr. Bruce recommended E. A. regarding that field as well.

    With that being said, Robert Bruce has a very good book called The Practical Psychic Self-Defense Handbook. The latest edition you can find on Amazon has pretty much everything he’d recommend to you in a personal consultation regarding your situation, so it’d be a lot cheaper to just get the book… or even just read the quick-start guide in the free sample might be enough.

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  3. I think we are afraid of being told we don’t have free will. Sometimes I think, maybe we shouldn’t have it. My reasons are because of how we live now a days but never the less, it’s an opinion. Not fact.


  4. Temporal, I’ve been through a Kundalini awakening (I’m still going through it, it’s been extremely harsh) and I’ve also had the same thing with my Succubus, she’s very insatiable, clingy, and doesn’t really like taking no for an answer, if push comes to shove she’ll stop for a bit, she’s been an amazing and loving girlfriend, providing everything an amazing girlfriend should. I’ve been following Robert Bruce for a few years as well, and my Kundalini awakened as a result of practicing his methods, his Catch Basket concept really saved my sanity n.n.

    I was wondering If you ever experienced bouts where the interaction because really bad and erratic? Sometimes I can have clear visions of her and hear her and feel her body on mine, and at other times, I experience little to nothing. Our relationship has always been erratic, with me going through periods lasting anywhere from a week to two weeks where her presence is extremely strong and grows much stronger with each day that passes, just to experience little to nothing for weeks to months on end, I never stop feeling her completely, just that she feels really weak.

    I’m going through this awakening, and the growing pains and side effects are severe, so severe that i can barely function at times, can’t even think straight, i was wondering if that was the cause for why i can barely sense her at times? I started off not even being able to make love with her, that took a year and a half before i could even start to feel her that way, and it’s been getting much stronger, with each time that we do it the pleasure becomes much stronger.. But I want a more stable relationship with her, which is impossible right now, the last time me and her were able to make love was 5 weeks ago. Ever since it’s been incredibly weak and erratic. Would you perhaps know as to why things are so erratic? I kind of figured it was my body adjusting to the higher levels of energy and things needing to shut down for a while.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. You know, I think a lot about the attraction/repulshion aspect of having a succubus lover. I don’t think there’s much difference between that and a physical love as far as that goes. It makes you wonder if electrons and protons get sick of each other, lol.

    It seems that we are all paired in this universe for spiritual growth. Demon, Angel, whatever… they all go to the same parties, trust me.

    The rest is just a song and dance to make us learn, like putting raw gold in the furnace to melt impurities.

    That’s all this is, one big dance, one big show, one big learning experience.

    I hear the afterparty is to die for. Lol.

    Take care you two.

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  6. That goes back to the point i made before once you start this path there is no going back whatsoever.Not truly anyways.I noticed that anytime i ignore miladies they don’t get mad or always try to arouse me until i acknowledge them when they do start to do so.Then and only then do they continue the sexual escapades.And what you said about Robert bruce saying there’s 2 types of these beings rings true because my magickal mentor (Kevin Heinrich) said basically the same thing and he’s had !4+ years experience with the stuff you talk about.


  7. Hi,

    It’s a belief issue. Because you believe that your succubus can enter into your bio-field (or aura) she can. If you subconsiously believed that she can’t then she wouldn’t be able to. I am suffering from similar problems but my situation is much worse. I have a bunch of entities and sometimes real 3D aliens (Zetas) sucking energy from my chakras. They do it every night when I lie down and do a lot of damage to the chakras themselves. They spin off axis, become the wrong colours, cause pain and a lot of other health issues. On top of all of that I have a bunch of other health problems from past prescription drug abuse (clean now though) such as nerves problems, muscle problems, organ problems and brain damage. I also have a really clingy dead girl that is in love with me. Not a succubus but pretty much the same thing. She is pretty much a rapist. I don’t want her and would love the chance to inflict immense pain on her and the other entities but I obviously can’t. My only suggestion would be to go to a legit medium and try to talk with your higher self and/or spirit guides and see what advice they have to offer. I would recommend a medium from the following list: http://www.channelingerikmediums.com/about . They might interfere but mine pretty much won’t. They say it is my battle to deal with meaning that I will probably end up killing myself. Also please let me know if you have any success.


    • Firstly, thanks for reaching out. I understand that things might seem hopeless right now. I believe that killing yourself would be a mistake. If you really are to the point of suicide, stop everything in your life right now and do something you’ve always wanted to do. Get a credit card, take out a big loan, travel, see, or do what you really want. You’ve got nothing to lose, right? You might as well make the most of it. Hopefully, by the time you come back, you won’t want to kill yourself anymore.

      There is a science behind belief and faith that I don’t understand yet. I’m not sure how much belief can impact the degree to which these entities can interfere in our lives. However, I do believe that if enough emotion and conviction is loaded behind the intent, it’s like a powder charge igniting against a bullet. We can change things, but we have to really want it bad enough to actually make the change. If I really wanted to be free of Catherine, I’m sure I could be, but it would take a lot of work. There’s a big part of me that loves Catherine and doesn’t want her to go. I believe that she has become an intrinsic part of me. She’s too interesting and fun, despite some of the attacks I’ve dealt with.

      These beings don’t seem to have a concept of rape. Consent is not part of their vocabulary. I get the impression that these beings are trying to communicate their affection in the best way they know how, and us not wanting it has very little sway over their desires. Ultimately, I think we need to break out of the predator-prey mentality when dealing with these problems. If we think and act like vulnerable prey, these spirits will respond in kind, because they think this is how we want to be treated. Again, it takes a force of will to change this mentality.

      Lastly, I would only trust a psychic/medium/spirit healer in a coaching capacity. These people can offer very little in the way of direct intervention. Ultimately, you are the only one who can truly intervene for yourself, though I’m not denying that there is some guidance to be had from others.

      Feel free to send me an e-mail.


      • Thanks for the response. For the most part I don’t play victim. I fight back hard every day through visualization, mantras, grounding, ORMUS, diet, cutting chords, patching up my aura, epsom salts, essential oils and certain devices such as Q-Link and Blushield. If I could physically fight them I would but that isn’t possible. I had a go one time when I astral projected when I was asleep but I lacked the required lucidity and the skill and I ended up punching the air as the entity easily evaded me. Fighting an invisible force that you can’t physically harm puts me (well anyone really) at a massive disadvantage. All of my health issues make it even more difficult for me. I have even had a highly respected psychic tell me that some of the entities that I am fighting are quite powerful and my odds of succeeding aren’t good. She has battled them before as well (including demons). I apparently vibrate at a very high frequency (well within the top 1% on earth at the moment) and this attracts them to me like moth’s to a flame. A bunch of other psychics have said similar things such as I am 6D and too big for my body (one used an analogy of putting a ferrari engine in a shitty ford and expecting it work without things breaking). It just doesn’t work well. I have also been told that I have an etheric device attached to my left side that is feeding energy to some extra-terrestrials for sampling or some sort of research (not sure if that group is good or bad)… Similar to you I suspect at least one of them is a demon as it matches the description in Robert Bruces book (started reading it yesterday). Anyway thanks again.


        • Do you know why I called this blog Alchemy By Fire? Because that is what I believe we are going through. Some of us are just on a more accelerated path to our desired outcome. I believe this is your initiation, my friend. Not into some stuffy old fraternity, but a journey of true growth.

          We were never promised happiness on this path. It’s full of hardship, trials, and desperation, as you well know. But what this process may enable us to do is make the world better. And not through meaningless platitudes, but refined wisdom tried in the fires of Hell.

          Did you know that I still believe in God? I despise the New Age terminology of “Higher-Self” or “The Universe.” We’re all taking about the Christian God and pretending not to. I think it’s high-time we stop spitting on our long-fought heritage. (I’m going to elaborate on this later. So sick of this fluffy-puffy feminist spirituality.)

          I believe none of this is happening to us by accident. I believe there is a spiritual hierarchy and even the demonic realm is under the command of the Most High. God and Satan are not in some kind of wrestling match for power. They work together to teach us how to be better. Even the Bible says that God is the originator of both good and evil, light and shadow, etc. (Isaiah 45:7)

          I’m not going to suggest that you pray (prey) to Jesus Christ and accept his righteousness. We all know where that gets us from experience. (Nowhere.) We need to forge our own righteousness, and demons are the very best teachers for making that happen. It’s the school of spiritual hard-knocks.


        • A lot of the new age stuff pisses me off as well but I don’t like Christianity either. Also a lot of the stuff in the bible is bullshit.

          I agree that calling in Jesus and Angels is useless. They sit there and do nothing. My spirit guides are also relatively useless and have given me a bunch of bad advice that has turned out to either have no effect or even damage my health in some instances.

          I already know that I was supposed to get sick in this life and then fix myself in order to help others. Problems is though I got a bit carried away with that part and I have done too much damage to my body. I am effectively disabled and can barely work. Already spent years and close to $200,000 trying to fix my health. Improved in some areas but other things have remained stubbornly un-fixable. Not being afraid of death and knowing that all this pain and suffering will end if I take that path doesn’t exactly help things either.


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